my dads been terminally ill for 2 years now. hes one of those old school, traditional arab fathers, there is no way, ever, in any possible timeline or universe that he could accept a gay son. when i accidently came out to my mother and sisters a year ago,while trying to be understanding they warned me not to tell my dad, so i agreed not to come out publicly until he wasnt around anymore. i accepted that and got over it. around a year ago i started making solid, on paper plans for my life and how i was going to live it after he passed away. this morning we found out that there was a chance he might make it. i love my dad, honestly i do, but the first thing through my mind wasnt joy or being crazy happy. i thought “damn. now what the fk am i supposed to do?” and for a moment resented him for ruining all the plans i’d so carefully made.
i have never felt so guilty in my life
If you feel that you can’t come out to him; then don’t.
Get in a financially independent situation (if you’re not already in one) and then move on. It’s a wasted cause.
Do you live at home with your parents? If you told your dad, what could he do to you? Your dad may suprise you! But then again he could dis-own you.
On some level, your dad has an idea about his son! And I pretty sure he has heard a thing or two about his son.
I wish you well my friend!!!
I have no answer for you. Just be kind and gentle with yourself. It doesn’t sound like anyone else is doing that for you.
with love
Be kind and gentle to your Dad he’s going through a lot right now. He could use an understanding son at this time. Not vice versa. Love him now that you have time. He may get better but parents dont live forever. And neither wil you so find ways to enjoy your life and embrace your sexuality. It may or may not include your dad.